Ugh. I don't usually give any time of day to artists like Katy Perry - it's just that her songs are so catchy that whether you like them or not you catch yourself singing them and humming them involuntarily.
That's why I think the crap she's spewing as teenage wisdom and truth is so dangerous. I'm especially thinking of the line in "Teenage Dream" that says, 'let's go all the way tonight. No regrets, just love." That sounds so beautiful, doesn't it? 'this time, there's no regrets, just our pure wonderful and real love' - obviously brought on by another line in the song, 'just one touch and baby, I believe this is real.' What?? You're supposed to go all the way tonight with no regrets because of one touch that lets me know that this love is the real love! Cuz everyone knows that the way you know real love is by 'one touch!' Yeah right.
It IS a teenage fantasy that can make teens THINK it's teenage reality and NORMAL teenage activity. It's not! It's a bunch of crap. Real love is found the same way pearls are created, or diamonds. Pearls become that way by being polished over a long period of time by silt and sand inside of a clam shell. That grinding is not easy. It's painful, but the end result, over time, is beautiful. Diamonds become diamonds by the pressure of the earth hardening it and perfecting it. Again, painfully hard work and a long period of time.
Every true love relationship can only be 'known' when both people have gone through tough times with each other and come out the other side still knowing that the other is worth it, and the one for me. Still willing to endure together. "Going all the way tonight" takes all of the attention away from a true, long-term commitment to a person instead placing all of the attention on just one particular body part, gratifying the sexual desires of the moment.
Every relationship needs to endure some times when both people are gritting their teeth and saying, "Uuuuuugggggggghhhhhhhh! This isn't easy, but we're willing to make the hard choice because we are committed to each other, for the long haul, forever." And that's not a sacrifice like, "Oh yeah, we both loved this same kind of gum and then they stopped making it anymore, and so we couldn't get this gum anymore, but we just didn't care anymore cuz our love was more important." I'm talking about the real tough stuff - and the toughest of all - CHOOSING to NOT "go all the way tonight". Because you can't choose to do it with no regrets, like Katy Perry tries to tell you!! The regrets always come AFTERWARD!
In the garden of Gethsemane, jesus said "Uuuuuuuuuuuuggggggggggggghhhhhhh, this isn't easy, but I'm going to do it because of love." He did the very hard thing out of love - giving his all.
True love, with no regrets is one that is built on a commitment to stay together. It has nothing to do with "going all the way tonight", in fact, it's only found in saying, "I want to, but I'm not going to go all the way with you until after we commit ourselves forever in marriage. I'm willing, and I'm going to wait even though my body says, 'uuuuuuuuuggggggggggghhhhhhh" right now. That's how i will know our love is real, and will give us a lifetime of "no regrets."